Hello. Since I was a child, I used to look up at the big blue sky, the trees, plants, animals, and humans and wonder where is the great being that made all this. Why don't I see him? Where is he, or she, or whoever he is? Why did he create us all, and then hide from us? Why couldn't he show himself to us?
Then I grew young, got busy in my life and never thought about God, was enjoying life like everyone else. Whenever I was in a trial situation as if I didn't do my homework or an exam, I would pray to him and ask for help. I always go out of the situation and would quickly forget about him and go on in my life.
Time went by, and I fell into sin, hopelessness, and gloom. I knew what I was doing was wrong but felt powerless to change anything. These things had such a hold on me that I could not stop doing them even if I tried.
I suffered betrayal from my friends and close ones and realized that there was no one whom I could trust. One day someone shared with me who Jesus was and what he did on the cross. Someone (not anybody else but God himself) already paid the price for my wrong doings so I wouldn't go on suffering. I realized that it was not God who was hiding from me because I was ashamed of my wrong deeds.
God cared for me enough that he lived as a human, born in a stable, suffered and died a horrible death on the cross all because of my misdeeds. I could finally understand god and came to know of his great love for me (not just for me but for all who would believe in him).
I still do not understand the depth of his love, I fall short of His expectations, but He has made it clear time and again, that I could never sin enough for Him to give up on me. He has forgiven me again and again, every time I have failed him.
I am motivated to live my life for Him because it is not mine anymore, it was always His and will be. Every time, I face temptation, I resist because it is the least I can do; because it will cause more pain and suffering to not only me but also to God.
Thank you for reading. If you ever feel that you just committed the biggest sin of your life and God will say, "Enough, leave him to his state," then you are mistaken, because you can never out sin His grace. He will always keep guiding and persevering you because he loves you!